Madame Opera

It’s official. The votes are in; I am the most embarrassing Mommy in the world. The other morning while driving my kids to school, I dialed my satellite radio to the alternative ’80s channel (First Wave) looking for some cool morning tunes we could all get down to. ABC’s “Shoot that Poison Arrow” comes on. As usual, with pretty much any song that station plays, I squeal, “Oooh, I love this song!” I turn it up and start singing and tiny dancing in the car. From the back seat comes the loudest cry-scream you’ve ever heard! “MOMMY! STOP! YOU ARE SO EMBARRASSING!” I turn up the song, tune my kids out, and imagine myself on the podium at Phases (Valley’s hottest New Wave dance club). I pull back my imaginary arrow while holding firmly to the steering wheel with the other and shoot it right into the car in the other lane! The screams emanating from the back make me think it was a real arrow! “OH MY GAAD MOMMY! This is so not funny! What are you, Madame Opera or something?! YOU NEED TO STOP SINGING RIGHT NOW!” Do I listen? Of course not! I turn the music up and sing even louder, now with a British accent. I say, “Be careful or I’ll roll the windows down, darlings!” More screams. Now they are begging and crying, “PLEASE MOMMY, PLEASE STOP!” We are now pulling into the school parking lot, and my kids are losing it; my daughter practically breaths out fire when she tells me, “I will never, ever forgive you if you start singing in front of my friends.” Yikes! The girl means business! Well, the song ends, so I do, too. I mull over my new nickname: Madame Opera. Hmm, I kind of like it.

If you want to sing out, sing out! Maybe it’s a generational thing, but I love belting out a tune in my car, and as long as you are practicing save driving, have fun… even if it is a tad bit embarrassing to the 12-and-under set. And if you want to sing along…

“If I were to say to you
‘Can you keep a secret?’
Would you know just what to do
Or where to keep it?
Then I say ‘I love you’
And foul the situation
‘Hey girl I thought we were
the right combination’
Who broke my heart?
You did you did
Bow to the target,
Blame cupid, cupid
You think you’re smart
Stupid, stupid
Shoot that poison arrow though to my heart
Shoot that poison arrow.”